My mind wanders. If you've ever had a conversation with me, you know that I tend to take the long way around, sometimes, to get to my point. Well, if you've read many of my posts, you've probably see that I write in much the same way. Add to that, while I'm giving you many more details than necessary, and the related history of events/encounters/relationships, I might also "bird-walk." You know, for example, I might be discussing how I acquired some bit of information/knowledge and the next thing you'll hear me say is, "wait, that reminds me of...", that is a bird-walk. So, with that, let me explain the "what-the-hell-is-she-going-to-talk-about-now-with-that-kind-of-a-title," theory behind the title.
Well, it started a few years ago. As I've mentioned previously, Haime and I are cradle-to-grave Catholics. From a very early age, we have been taught that if you lead a good life, keep the commandments and jump through a few more hoops, you'll go to heaven when you die, provided that you are free of sin upon your demise. Now, if you happen to croak prior to being able to avail yourself of the confessional and you meet-your-maker with some unconfessed, and therefore unabsolved faux-pau, well, you'll probably find yourself in purgatory (not the ski resort, you goof--you know who you are!) Think of purgatory as "hell-lite," only you get to get out of there, provided that you've served your time. (Time is also credited to you when your surviving family, friends etc. offer prayers for your early release). Once you've served your time, ZIPP...your beamed up to Heaven. Now, the third option is HELL! I mean, like Monopoly...do not pass go, do not collect any reading materials, you are going to the eternal barbecue as the main course.
Well, I know you're gonna be a little shocked here...I'm not sure I'm buying that particular if-then scenario any more...OK, I've always had a problem with that. No, I'm not channelling W.C. Fields here, (you know the story...Mr. Fields had been ill and was not expected to survive and a friend came to visit him one day and found W.C. reading the bible. Now Mr. Fields was never considered a religious man and when the friend asked him about it, W. C. replied "I'm looking for loopholes.")
Anyway, think about it, we are taught that our God is a loving and generous and forgiving God. Our lives, our talents and our blessings come from Him. I believe that. So, here's what I'm thinking, what if this life we are living is our purgatory? What if Shirley MacLaine isn't crazy? What if the lives we live today are our time
and chances to right wrongs that we've committed in previous lives or our opportunities to learn that God is Goodness and Love and Truth and Light? I was having the beginnings of this kind of conversation, the other day. (Not about Shirley, I actually came up with that a few hours later, while mowing the lawn)...but, what if I'm right?
Doesn't that mean that we owe it to ourselves to speak and act and cherish and hold and love and give-of-ourselves more than we think possible? Doesn't that mean that we ought to learn from our past mistakes, (I'm talking here about the ones we've made in this life because I'm honestly not convinced that Shirley isn't crazy). Well, I'm trying...and trying...and trying...and trying. You see, I'm human. I wake every morning and repeat my mantra before I get out of bed: "Lord, please keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth." Unfortunately, all too often, I knock His hand away and there goes my mouth. But, I'm learning. I think that's the important thing, don't you? That we learn. That we make honest efforts not to repeatedly make the same mistakes.
Well, that's it. If I decide to publish this post, thank you for indulging my drive to share my mind wanderings as they have manifested themselves through my writing tonight.